i'm in nd i'm out, sometimes i forget ma password or sometimes i just let it go ,sometimes i pity myself for lagging behind in the racing techno world or sometimes i dont even give it a second thought but wateva be ,i dont have to rise nd shine in everything that i do right? after all humans we are nd everyone of you must have been told somewhre nd in some point of life dat nobody's perfect (in many cases at times wen u desperately need to hear these two words nd they seem to be the only soothers for you to get back to normalcy ) just like i'm doing it to myself this very moment ....and now dat i'm in again i , i want to be in ,inner nd in the innermost without diminishing like in the past .
feelings mostly tend to overpower me sometimes making me the queen of my own imaginations with big visionaries nd full on confidence nd sometimes so powerless that i could be the riches to rags creature who ultimately has to surrender by saying " alas! cant help it coz dats the way how things function" .these feelings do not appear preplanned nd can take shape in the simplest of things or in the extremeties nd sometimes even when you are completely zapped nd the next thing they grab you in the core nd u r just left with feelings nd feelings nd feelings... nd these feelings are such that even wen u try to pour them in a paper ,words do not seem to give them enough justice dat they deserve nd in the end only you are aware of these feelings nd it continues to linger in your heart. similarly ,i felt something very strong today nd felt the need to scream out my feelings as these feelings dealt with my independence ,the independence that eveyone has the right to posses nd probably everyone of us posseses but even in this most independent decision concerning my very own independence i have to be dependent on you praying you to support me in my independent ways coz its possible only when you support me . i know this might sound weird but dats the fact. i too want to be independent just like you .i too have a fierce craving in me to be independent nd live my life without much pondering upon the consequences ,i too want to be a free soul without bothering what next but fear binds me nd tells me to be careful nd think twice before doing anything but sometimes even thinking twice nd being most careful does not stop you from the worst happenings dat are to take place. its painful wen such realization strucks you nd all you can do is nothing but a momentary thought also told me about what if i could make even a little difference nd voice my feelings through these words i do not know if these words justify my feelings like i said before but id definitely share it with you with whatever best i can nd only hope from deep within me dat maybe somehow i make a difference even if is a little one it would definitely be a good start for me to voice my feelings through this manner nd all i can do for the moment is keep that burning flame lit in ma heart ....nd regarding the fierce feeling of my indepence ill definitely let you know about it in the next post nd for the time being just try to understand my feelings ....
feelings mostly tend to overpower me sometimes making me the queen of my own imaginations with big visionaries nd full on confidence nd sometimes so powerless that i could be the riches to rags creature who ultimately has to surrender by saying " alas! cant help it coz dats the way how things function" .these feelings do not appear preplanned nd can take shape in the simplest of things or in the extremeties nd sometimes even when you are completely zapped nd the next thing they grab you in the core nd u r just left with feelings nd feelings nd feelings... nd these feelings are such that even wen u try to pour them in a paper ,words do not seem to give them enough justice dat they deserve nd in the end only you are aware of these feelings nd it continues to linger in your heart. similarly ,i felt something very strong today nd felt the need to scream out my feelings as these feelings dealt with my independence ,the independence that eveyone has the right to posses nd probably everyone of us posseses but even in this most independent decision concerning my very own independence i have to be dependent on you praying you to support me in my independent ways coz its possible only when you support me . i know this might sound weird but dats the fact. i too want to be independent just like you .i too have a fierce craving in me to be independent nd live my life without much pondering upon the consequences ,i too want to be a free soul without bothering what next but fear binds me nd tells me to be careful nd think twice before doing anything but sometimes even thinking twice nd being most careful does not stop you from the worst happenings dat are to take place. its painful wen such realization strucks you nd all you can do is nothing but a momentary thought also told me about what if i could make even a little difference nd voice my feelings through these words i do not know if these words justify my feelings like i said before but id definitely share it with you with whatever best i can nd only hope from deep within me dat maybe somehow i make a difference even if is a little one it would definitely be a good start for me to voice my feelings through this manner nd all i can do for the moment is keep that burning flame lit in ma heart ....nd regarding the fierce feeling of my indepence ill definitely let you know about it in the next post nd for the time being just try to understand my feelings ....
